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Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread :)
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Re: Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread
"Go and have a look at the size of the **** I've just done in the bathroom!" I said to my wife.
"No thanks," she replied.
"Please, just one quick look," I said, "You won't believe it."
She pinched her nose, ran in, looked down the toilet, then ran out and said, "There's nothing down there, you must've flushed it."
I said, "It's on the scales."WALTER IS MY HERO!!
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Re: Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread
The best pubs are in Ireland
"As good as this bar is," said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow , there's a wee place called McTavish's.
The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink."
"Well, Angus," said the Englishman, "At my local in London , the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two."
"Ahhh, dat's nothin'," said the Irishman, "back home in me favourite pub, the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink,
then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see dat you gets laid, all on the house.”
The Englishman and Scotsman were suspicious of the claims. The Irishman swore every word was true. They asked, “did this actually happen to you?"
"Not meself, personally, no," admitted the Irishman, "but it did happen to me sister quite a few times .."WALTER IS MY HERO!!
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Re: Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread
A short joke for you
A man goes into a Barnes and Noble and asks the young female clerk, "Do you have the new book out for men with short penises? I can't remember the title."
She replies, "I'm not sure if it's in yet."
The man says, "That's the one. I'll take a copyWALTER IS MY HERO!!
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Re: Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread
Can't say this is too funny, but damn if I could find another thread to put it in...
http://www.edmontonsun.com/2012/12/1...away-from-ring
Ouch....
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Re: Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread
dementia
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since recently being diagnosed with the early on-set of dementia my grandkids have taken great pleasure in poking fun at every available opportunity and generally treating me like a simpleton.
well,to get them back i have decided that this christmas when they visit there will be no gifts of easter eggs under the bonfire for them.WALTER IS MY HERO!!
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Re: Daily funnies - The Pizmo Thread
The Queen and Stephen Harper
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The Queen and Stephen Harper are attending a huge charity concert at the Forum.
The Queen says, “Do you realise that with one wave of my hand, I could bring immediate and lasting joy to all the people watching us?”
Harper says “Well your Majesty I think you may be exaggerating a little”
The Queen says” Would one like to put it to the test?”
Harper says “Yes, of course!”
So she punches him in the mouth......Last edited by pizmo; 01-23-2013, 07:56 PM.WALTER IS MY HERO!!
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